I think managing our time is one of the least conquered skills in the youth ministry profession.
I’ve seen one too many of my peers give it their all — filling up a monthly youth calendar, going to student’s extracurricular activities, taking late night phone calls, going out for sodas/coffee, and inviting students into their homes at all hours with disastrous consequences. It’s to the point where I think it’s one of the top reasons that so many youth workers “peter out” after only a couple of years. They’ve over-committed themselves, over-filled their calendar, said “yes” to too many things, and many times leave no space for their home life, rest, or self-edification and spiritual growth.
All of this leads to burn-out.
Some of this comes from self-inflicted pressure to perform and do our best (I’m talking to you, Mr. Melancholy/Perfectionist) and other times the pressure actually comes from our church staff to “keep the calendar full and the kids busy”. Busyness has almost become a badge of honor that we wear like another feather on our hat. It’s another notch on our belt towards self-fulfilled feelings of adequacy.
Truth be told, though, real student ministry and life-change isn’t going to happen through a full calendar of ministry events. In fact, I’ve even heard of parents complaining when the student ministry calendar becomes too full! Interesting, huh?
My advice? Set very clear boundaries between work and rest.
- SET BLOCKS OF TIMES IN YOUR DAY/WEEK THAT ARE RESERVED FOR DOWNTIME. If you’re a family man, your family will love you; if you are single, you are setting yourself up for long-term ministry health.
In my personal life, my two days off are generally reserved for family and free time. I also do my best to keep my family in priority in the evenings — from about 5:00 PM to 9:00 PM. If a student calls during this time, I will ask them if it’s all right if I call them a bit later or the next day. 9 times out of 10, most students have no problem with that.
- TALK PUBLICLY ABOUT YOUR “FAMILY/REST TIME”. Don’t announce it in a way that makes it seem like you are “off limits”; talk about your personal time as your time set aside to refill and refresh, to be with your family, and to spend personal time with God.
- DON’T TAKE WORK HOME WITH YOU. Do your best to keep your work e-mail separate from your personal account. Don’t stop by the office on your weekends unless absolutely necessary. And as much as possible, keep your paperwork on your work desk, not the family couch.
- SABBATH, MEANING “TO CEASE”, IS A BIBLICAL PRACTICE — PRACTICE IT! When you have down time, set apart some time for recharging. Relax. Be still. Listen. Pray. Read. Rest. Just as rest stops are necessary on long journeys, if you want to make the long haul in youth ministry, make sabbath a priority. It’s okay to not “live and breath” your job all the time.
- REST IS A PLACE OF BEING NURTURED. It’s a sanctuary, a place for growth, and a place for protection. It becomes a place where we can regain our strength, gain our bearings, and heal our wounds.
- LEARN HOW TO SAY “NO”. You don’t have to do it all. It’s hard at first, especially when you work with a smaller team, but this is for both your personal health and the health of your overall ministry. Doug Fields has a great book to check out in this regard titled, What Matters Most. Bottom line: don’t overstretch yourself in one arena to make yourself ineffective in all the others over the long haul.
Don’t fall into the trap of trying to do it all. Nobody can set themselves up for that without failing.
Rely heavily on Jesus, find your rest in Him, and you’ll find yourself healthier and steadfast in your resolve to reach out to students.
[Photo by: 96dpi]
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Shawn is the pastor to students at Destiny Foursquare Church in Rapid City, SD
Blog: Elevating A Generation
Twitter: http://twitter.com/shawnmichael
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{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
good points Shawn. All of those will help you manage your time and last longer in ministry.
Thanks Mike.
As with almost every single topic that this blog covers, it comes back to our theology doesn't it? I mean, when we feel like we need to earn our favor with God, that says something about our theology. When we feel like we need to impress others around us, that says something about our theology. Tips like keeping the Sabbath are good, common sense, life rules (even Dancing With The Stars understands this now, http://bit.ly/132czb . Let's go further in everything that we do and keep thinking theologically. Thanks for the tips Shawn!
Oh! I almost forgot! So often we can feel guilty about our rest time. Like we are being lazy. Never forget, if you are resting correctly then you are doing real work for your soul! Don't feel guilty about appropriate rest & don't let busyness keep you from doing this important work.
Good point, Chris. Rest is something we ALL need!
Great article Shawn.
I'm learning that saying "No" is less important than giving that person the resources they need to take on whatever they are looking to have me do! YS had a great post "Are You a Marketer" I think we are all definitely that, in fact my wife and I will be marketing at lunch w/ a couple of students about the vision for this year! But I think we are also, if not more, "resourcers!" We resource/encourage/turn loose our students and leaders to "DO MINISTRY" rather than allowing them to sit back and watch it happen!
Just my $.02!
BTW I am writing this from my office desk on my day off because I am preaching this Sunday and my time management doesn't usually allow me to get it all done in 4 days when you add in 6 hrs sermon prep! Anywho! I'm still learning to give stuff away it is so much better than it was! Thanks in large part to our network this blog and my relationship (Virtual and real) w/ great YP's like yourself!
Thanks for the props, Bro!
We're all still IN PROCESS. I'm coming off a 9-day trip with a lot on my desk right now. I pulled a late night at the office last night. Sometimes we have to allow for that. The good news is I also got a couple of comp days to make up for it and I've got a wife who understands student ministry and makes allowances for that.
I appreciated that article from YS, too (read it here: http://www.youthspecialties.com/blog/2009/are-you... What you are saying makes good sense. The trouble for most of us (READ: "Shawn") is that if we don't learn to say "no" first, YM marketing just becomes another thing on our TO-DO list that keeps us busy. Know what I mean? We just need to be careful.
So thankful to have a friendship with you through the network. You should be writing these articles, Man!
I totally agree! With everything you said in the original post and in your comment! I wasn't at all disagreeing with you and the only reason it prolly came across that way is because I have a lot on my mind right now (good ym and church stuff) but it makes it hard to communicate clearly sometimes!
Thanks for all you do!
When I learn to give away more/ manage time better I would love to write more but until then it just can't be as important as the rest of the stuff I have on my plate!
good word Shawn.